{"id":14338,"date":"2026-03-17T14:25:49","date_gmt":"2026-03-17T07:25:49","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/mb668s.com\/cam-nang-7mb66-xoc-dia\/?p=14338"},"modified":"2026-05-28T12:16:35","modified_gmt":"2026-05-28T05:16:35","slug":"people-pleaser-la-gi","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/mb668s.com\/cam-nang-7mb66-xoc-dia\/tu-van-nghe-nghiep\/people-pleaser-la-gi","title":{"rendered":"People Pleaser l\u00e0 g\u00ec? D\u1ea5u hi\u1ec7u v\u00e0 c\u00e1ch thay \u0111\u1ed5i trong c\u00f4ng vi\u1ec7c"},"content":{"rendered":"

Trong m\u00f4i tr\u01b0\u1eddng c\u00f4ng s\u1edf, c\u00f3 nh\u1eefng ng\u01b0\u1eddi lu\u00f4n nh\u1eadn th\u00eam vi\u1ec7c d\u00f9 \u0111\u00e3 qu\u00e1 t\u1ea3i, kh\u00f4ng bao gi\u1edd t\u1eeb ch\u1ed1i y\u00eau c\u1ea7u c\u1ee7a \u0111\u1ed3ng nghi\u1ec7p, v\u00e0 c\u1ea3m th\u1ea5y lo l\u1eafng m\u1ed7i khi c\u1ea7n b\u00e0y t\u1ecf \u00fd ki\u1ebfn tr\u00e1i chi\u1ec1u. H\u00e0nh vi n\u00e0y \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c g\u1ecdi l\u00e0 people pleaser<\/strong> \u2014 xu h\u01b0\u1edbng t\u00e2m l\u00fd \u0111\u1eb7t nhu c\u1ea7u c\u1ee7a ng\u01b0\u1eddi kh\u00e1c l\u00ean tr\u00ean nhu c\u1ea7u c\u1ee7a b\u1ea3n th\u00e2n m\u1ed9t c\u00e1ch th\u01b0\u1eddng xuy\u00ean v\u00e0 thi\u1ebfu ki\u1ec3m so\u00e1t. B\u00e0i vi\u1ebft ph\u00e2n t\u00edch bi\u1ec3u hi\u1ec7n, nguy\u00ean nh\u00e2n v\u00e0 c\u00e1ch tho\u00e1t kh\u1ecfi v\u00f2ng l\u1eb7p n\u00e0y.<\/p>\n

\"People<\/figure>\n
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T\u1ed5ng quan nhanh v\u1ec1 People Pleaser<\/strong><\/p>\n

\u2013 People pleaser (ng\u01b0\u1eddi lu\u00f4n chi\u1ec1u l\u00f2ng) l\u00e0 xu h\u01b0\u1edbng t\u00e2m l\u00fd \u0111\u1eb7t s\u1ef1 ch\u1ea5p thu\u1eadn c\u1ee7a ng\u01b0\u1eddi kh\u00e1c l\u00ean tr\u00ean nhu c\u1ea7u v\u00e0 ranh gi\u1edbi c\u00e1 nh\u00e2n, th\u01b0\u1eddng g\u00e2y h\u1ea1i cho s\u1ee9c kh\u1ecfe tinh th\u1ea7n v\u00e0 hi\u1ec7u su\u1ea5t ngh\u1ec1 nghi\u1ec7p d\u00e0i h\u1ea1n.<\/p>\n

\u2013 T\u00e2m l\u00fd n\u00e0y kh\u00f4ng ph\u1ea3i l\u00e0 \u0111\u1ee9c t\u00ednh t\u1ed1t \u0111\u01a1n thu\u1ea7n m\u00e0 th\u01b0\u1eddng b\u1eaft ngu\u1ed3n t\u1eeb lo \u00e2u, n\u1ed7i s\u1ee3 b\u1ecb t\u1eeb ch\u1ed1i ho\u1eb7c c\u00e1c tr\u1ea3i nghi\u1ec7m h\u00ecnh th\u00e0nh t\u1eeb th\u1eddi th\u01a1 \u1ea5u.<\/p>\n

\u2013 Ng\u01b0\u1eddi lao \u0111\u1ed9ng c\u00f3 xu h\u01b0\u1edbng people pleaser d\u1ec5 b\u1ecb ki\u1ec7t s\u1ee9c (burnout), b\u1ecb khai th\u00e1c qu\u00e1 m\u1ee9c v\u00e0 th\u01b0\u1eddng g\u1eb7p kh\u00f3 kh\u0103n trong vi\u1ec7c th\u0103ng ti\u1ebfn v\u00ec kh\u00f4ng d\u00e1m t\u1ef1 \u0111\u1ec1 xu\u1ea5t v\u00e0 th\u01b0\u01a1ng l\u01b0\u1ee3ng.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n

1. People Pleaser l\u00e0 g\u00ec? Ph\u00e2n bi\u1ec7t v\u1edbi ng\u01b0\u1eddi t\u1ed1t b\u1ee5ng th\u00f4ng th\u01b0\u1eddng<\/h2>\n

People pleaser<\/strong> (t\u1ea1m d\u1ecbch: ng\u01b0\u1eddi lu\u00f4n chi\u1ec1u l\u00f2ng) l\u00e0 thu\u1eadt ng\u1eef t\u00e2m l\u00fd h\u1ecdc m\u00f4 t\u1ea3 ki\u1ec3u h\u00e0nh vi trong \u0111\u00f3 m\u1ed9t ng\u01b0\u1eddi li\u00ean t\u1ee5c \u01b0u ti\u00ean s\u1ef1 h\u00e0i l\u00f2ng c\u1ee7a ng\u01b0\u1eddi kh\u00e1c, th\u01b0\u1eddng \u0111\u1ebfn m\u1ee9c hy sinh nhu c\u1ea7u, ranh gi\u1edbi v\u00e0 ph\u00fac l\u1ee3i c\u1ee7a ch\u00ednh m\u00ecnh. \u0110\u00e2y kh\u00f4ng ph\u1ea3i l\u00e0 l\u00f2ng t\u1ed1t hay tinh th\u1ea7n h\u1ee3p t\u00e1c th\u00f4ng th\u01b0\u1eddng \u2014 \u0111\u00f3 l\u00e0 m\u1ed9t c\u01a1 ch\u1ebf ph\u00f2ng v\u1ec7 t\u00e2m l\u00fd \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c h\u00ecnh th\u00e0nh \u0111\u1ec3 tr\u00e1nh xung \u0111\u1ed9t, t\u1eeb ch\u1ed1i ho\u1eb7c b\u1ecb \u0111\u00e1nh gi\u00e1 ti\u00eau c\u1ef1c.<\/p>\n

Ti\u1ebfn s\u0129 Susan Newman, nh\u00e0 t\u00e2m l\u00fd h\u1ecdc x\u00e3 h\u1ed9i ng\u01b0\u1eddi M\u1ef9 v\u00e0 t\u00e1c gi\u1ea3 cu\u1ed1n s\u00e1ch The Book of No<\/em>, ph\u00e2n bi\u1ec7t r\u00f5: ng\u01b0\u1eddi t\u1ed1t b\u1ee5ng gi\u00fap \u0111\u1ee1 v\u00ec h\u1ecd mu\u1ed1n v\u00e0 c\u00f3 kh\u1ea3 n\u0103ng; ng\u01b0\u1eddi people pleaser gi\u00fap \u0111\u1ee1 v\u00ec h\u1ecd s\u1ee3 h\u1eadu qu\u1ea3 n\u1ebfu kh\u00f4ng l\u00e0m v\u1eady. S\u1ef1 kh\u00e1c bi\u1ec7t n\u1eb1m \u1edf \u0111\u1ed9ng l\u1ef1c b\u00ean trong, kh\u00f4ng ph\u1ea3i h\u00e0nh \u0111\u1ed9ng b\u1ec1 ngo\u00e0i. Theo Hi\u1ec7p h\u1ed9i T\u00e2m l\u00fd h\u1ecdc M\u1ef9 (APA), xu h\u01b0\u1edbng n\u00e0y c\u00f3 li\u00ean quan \u0111\u1ebfn r\u1ed1i lo\u1ea1n lo \u00e2u x\u00e3 h\u1ed9i v\u00e0 h\u1ed9i ch\u1ee9ng ng\u01b0\u1eddi gi\u00fap \u0111\u1ee1 (fawn response) \u2014 m\u1ed9t trong b\u1ed1n ph\u1ea3n \u1ee9ng c\u1ee7a h\u1ec7 th\u1ea7n kinh khi \u0111\u1ed1i m\u1eb7t v\u1edbi c\u0103ng th\u1eb3ng (b\u00ean c\u1ea1nh fight, flight, freeze).<\/p>\n

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“Khi b\u1ea1n n\u00f3i c\u00f3 v\u1edbi m\u1ecdi th\u1ee9, b\u1ea1n \u0111ang n\u00f3i kh\u00f4ng v\u1edbi ch\u00ednh m\u00ecnh. Kh\u00f4ng c\u00f3 t\u1eeb n\u00e0o trong t\u1eeb \u0111i\u1ec3n ngh\u1ec1 nghi\u1ec7p t\u1ed1n k\u00e9m h\u01a1n t\u1eeb ‘c\u00f3’ b\u1ecb n\u00f3i sai th\u1eddi \u0111i\u1ec3m.” \u2014 Ti\u1ebfn s\u0129 Harriet Braiker, t\u00e1c gi\u1ea3 The Disease to Please<\/em>.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

Ranh gi\u1edbi gi\u1eefa h\u00f2a \u0111\u1ed3ng v\u00e0 people pleasing<\/h3>\n

Ng\u01b0\u1eddi h\u00f2a \u0111\u1ed3ng t\u1ea1i n\u01a1i l\u00e0m vi\u1ec7c bi\u1ebft c\u00e1ch h\u1ee3p t\u00e1c, linh ho\u1ea1t v\u00e0 s\u1eb5n s\u00e0ng nh\u01b0\u1ee3ng b\u1ed9 khi c\u1ea7n thi\u1ebft, nh\u01b0ng v\u1eabn gi\u1eef \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c ranh gi\u1edbi c\u00e1 nh\u00e2n v\u00e0 c\u00f3 th\u1ec3 n\u00f3i kh\u00f4ng khi c\u1ea7n. Ng\u01b0\u1eddi people pleaser th\u00ec kh\u00f4ng: h\u1ecd kh\u00f4ng th\u1ec3 t\u1eeb ch\u1ed1i d\u00f9 bi\u1ebft m\u00ecnh \u0111ang qu\u00e1 t\u1ea3i, v\u00e0 c\u1ea3m th\u1ea5y t\u1ed9i l\u1ed7i s\u00e2u s\u1eafc m\u1ed7i khi kh\u00f4ng th\u1ecfa m\u00e3n k\u1ef3 v\u1ecdng c\u1ee7a ng\u01b0\u1eddi kh\u00e1c \u2014 d\u00f9 k\u1ef3 v\u1ecdng \u0111\u00f3 c\u00f3 h\u1ee3p l\u00fd hay kh\u00f4ng.<\/p>\n

2. D\u1ea5u hi\u1ec7u nh\u1eadn bi\u1ebft ng\u01b0\u1eddi c\u00f3 xu h\u01b0\u1edbng People Pleaser trong c\u00f4ng vi\u1ec7c<\/h2>\n

Nhi\u1ec1u ng\u01b0\u1eddi kh\u00f4ng nh\u1eadn ra m\u00ecnh \u0111ang \u1edf trong v\u00f2ng l\u1eb7p people pleasing cho \u0111\u1ebfn khi ki\u1ec7t s\u1ee9c ho\u00e0n to\u00e0n. C\u00e1c bi\u1ec3u hi\u1ec7n th\u01b0\u1eddng xu\u1ea5t hi\u1ec7n d\u1ea7n d\u1ea7n v\u00e0 \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c ng\u1ee5y trang d\u01b0\u1edbi d\u1ea1ng “tinh th\u1ea7n tr\u00e1ch nhi\u1ec7m” ho\u1eb7c “th\u00e1i \u0111\u1ed9 chuy\u00ean nghi\u1ec7p”, khi\u1ebfn ng\u01b0\u1eddi trong cu\u1ed9c v\u00e0 nh\u1eefng ng\u01b0\u1eddi xung quanh kh\u00f3 nh\u1eadn di\u1ec7n s\u1edbm.<\/p>\n

\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n
D\u1ea5u hi\u1ec7u<\/th>\nBi\u1ec3u hi\u1ec7n trong c\u00f4ng vi\u1ec7c<\/th>\nH\u1ec7 qu\u1ea3 th\u01b0\u1eddng g\u1eb7p<\/th>\n<\/tr>\n<\/thead>\n
Kh\u00f4ng th\u1ec3 t\u1eeb ch\u1ed1i y\u00eau c\u1ea7u<\/td>\nNh\u1eadn th\u00eam d\u1ef1 \u00e1n d\u00f9 \u0111\u00e3 qu\u00e1 t\u1ea3i, kh\u00f4ng n\u00f3i kh\u00f4ng v\u1edbi s\u1ebfp ho\u1eb7c \u0111\u1ed3ng nghi\u1ec7p<\/td>\nBurnout, ch\u1ea5t l\u01b0\u1ee3ng c\u00f4ng vi\u1ec7c gi\u1ea3m<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Xin l\u1ed7i qu\u00e1 m\u1ee9c<\/td>\nXin l\u1ed7i k\u1ec3 c\u1ea3 khi kh\u00f4ng c\u00f3 l\u1ed7i, xin l\u1ed7i v\u00ec c\u00f3 \u00fd ki\u1ebfn kh\u00e1c<\/td>\nM\u1ea5t uy t\u00edn chuy\u00ean m\u00f4n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Tr\u00e1nh xung \u0111\u1ed9t b\u1eb1ng m\u1ecdi gi\u00e1<\/td>\n\u0110\u1ed3ng \u00fd v\u1edbi quy\u1ebft \u0111\u1ecbnh sai \u0111\u1ec3 kh\u00f4ng g\u00e2y c\u0103ng th\u1eb3ng trong nh\u00f3m<\/td>\nT\u1ed5 ch\u1ee9c \u0111\u01b0a ra quy\u1ebft \u0111\u1ecbnh k\u00e9m h\u01a1n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
C\u1ea7n \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c x\u00e1c nh\u1eadn li\u00ean t\u1ee5c<\/td>\nLo l\u1eafng n\u1ebfu s\u1ebfp ho\u1eb7c \u0111\u1ed3ng nghi\u1ec7p kh\u00f4ng ph\u1ea3n h\u1ed3i t\u00edch c\u1ef1c<\/td>\nPh\u1ee5 thu\u1ed9c c\u1ea3m x\u00fac, thi\u1ebfu t\u1ef1 ch\u1ee7<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
Kh\u00f3 b\u00e0y t\u1ecf nhu c\u1ea7u c\u00e1 nh\u00e2n<\/td>\nKh\u00f4ng y\u00eau c\u1ea7u t\u0103ng l\u01b0\u01a1ng d\u00f9 x\u1ee9ng \u0111\u00e1ng, kh\u00f4ng \u0111\u1ec1 xu\u1ea5t \u0111i\u1ec1u ch\u1ec9nh gi\u1edd l\u00e0m<\/td>\nL\u01b0\u01a1ng v\u00e0 v\u1ecb tr\u00ed th\u1ea5p h\u01a1n th\u1ecb tr\u01b0\u1eddng<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n
C\u1ea3m gi\u00e1c b\u1ecb l\u1ee3i d\u1ee5ng nh\u01b0ng kh\u00f4ng h\u00e0nh \u0111\u1ed9ng<\/td>\nNh\u1eadn ra m\u00ecnh l\u00e0m nhi\u1ec1u h\u01a1n ng\u01b0\u1eddi kh\u00e1c nh\u01b0ng kh\u00f4ng th\u1ec3 l\u00ean ti\u1ebfng<\/td>\nO\u00e1n gi\u1eadn t\u00edch l\u0169y, \u0111\u1ed9ng l\u1ef1c suy gi\u1ea3m<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<\/tbody>\n<\/table>\n<\/figure>\n

\u0110i\u1ec3m m\u1ea5u ch\u1ed1t \u0111\u1ec3 nh\u1eadn bi\u1ebft: ng\u01b0\u1eddi people pleaser th\u01b0\u1eddng c\u1ea3m th\u1ea5y nh\u1eb9 nh\u00f5m khi l\u00e0m ng\u01b0\u1eddi kh\u00e1c h\u00e0i l\u00f2ng v\u00e0 lo l\u1eafng b\u1ea5t th\u01b0\u1eddng khi kh\u00f4ng l\u00e0m \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c \u0111i\u1ec1u \u0111\u00f3. \u0110\u00e2y kh\u00f4ng ph\u1ea3i l\u00e0 s\u1ef1 h\u00e0i l\u00f2ng t\u1eeb vi\u1ec7c \u0111\u00f3ng g\u00f3p c\u00f3 \u00fd ngh\u0129a, m\u00e0 l\u00e0 s\u1ef1 gi\u1ea3i t\u1ecfa kh\u1ecfi lo \u00e2u \u2014 m\u1ed9t c\u01a1 ch\u1ebf t\u00e2m l\u00fd ho\u00e0n to\u00e0n kh\u00e1c. N\u1ebfu b\u1ea1n \u0111ang t\u00ecm ki\u1ebfm vi\u1ec7c l\u00e0m nh\u00e2n s\u1ef1 t\u1ea1i CareerLink<\/a><\/em><\/strong>, hi\u1ec3u bi\u1ebft v\u1ec1 xu h\u01b0\u1edbng t\u00e2m l\u00fd n\u00e0y s\u1ebd gi\u00fap b\u1ea1n chu\u1ea9n b\u1ecb t\u1ed1t h\u01a1n cho m\u00f4i tr\u01b0\u1eddng \u0111\u00e1nh gi\u00e1 n\u0103ng l\u1ef1c th\u1ef1c ch\u1ea5t.<\/p>\n

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L\u01b0u \u00fd: People Pleasing \u1ea3nh h\u01b0\u1edfng tr\u1ef1c ti\u1ebfp \u0111\u1ebfn l\u1ed9 tr\u00ecnh th\u0103ng ti\u1ebfn<\/strong><\/p>\n

\u2013 Ng\u01b0\u1eddi c\u00f3 xu h\u01b0\u1edbng people pleaser th\u01b0\u1eddng b\u1ecb \u0111\u00e1nh gi\u00e1 l\u00e0 thi\u1ebfu quy\u1ebft \u0111o\u00e1n v\u00e0 kh\u00f3 giao ph\u00f3 vai tr\u00f2 l\u00e3nh \u0111\u1ea1o \u2014 ngay c\u1ea3 khi n\u0103ng l\u1ef1c chuy\u00ean m\u00f4n t\u1ed1t.<\/p>\n

\u2013 Nghi\u00ean c\u1ee9u c\u1ee7a Harvard Business Review (2022) cho th\u1ea5y nh\u1eefng nh\u00e2n vi\u00ean kh\u00f4ng bi\u1ebft t\u1eeb ch\u1ed1i th\u01b0\u1eddng \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c giao th\u00eam c\u00f4ng vi\u1ec7c h\u00e0nh ch\u00ednh, gi\u1ea3m th\u1eddi gian cho c\u00f4ng vi\u1ec7c chi\u1ebfn l\u01b0\u1ee3c c\u00f3 gi\u00e1 tr\u1ecb cao h\u01a1n.<\/p>\n

\u2013 Kh\u1ea3 n\u0103ng n\u00f3i kh\u00f4ng v\u00e0 thi\u1ebft l\u1eadp ranh gi\u1edbi l\u00e0 k\u1ef9 n\u0103ng l\u00e3nh \u0111\u1ea1o \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c \u0111\u00e1nh gi\u00e1 cao, kh\u00f4ng ph\u1ea3i l\u00e0 th\u00e1i \u0111\u1ed9 thi\u1ebfu h\u1ee3p t\u00e1c.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n

3. Nguy\u00ean nh\u00e2n h\u00ecnh th\u00e0nh t\u00e2m l\u00fd People Pleaser<\/h2>\n

T\u00e2m l\u00fd people pleasing kh\u00f4ng ph\u00e1t sinh qua \u0111\u00eam. N\u00f3 th\u01b0\u1eddng \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c h\u00ecnh th\u00e0nh trong th\u1eddi th\u01a1 \u1ea5u qua c\u00e1c m\u00f4i tr\u01b0\u1eddng gia \u0111\u00ecnh ho\u1eb7c gi\u00e1o d\u1ee5c \u0111\u1ec1 cao s\u1ef1 ph\u1ee5c t\u00f9ng v\u00e0 tr\u1eebng ph\u1ea1t s\u1ef1 b\u1ea5t \u0111\u1ed3ng, v\u00e0 \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c c\u1ee7ng c\u1ed1 trong m\u00f4i tr\u01b0\u1eddng l\u00e0m vi\u1ec7c c\u00f3 v\u0103n h\u00f3a th\u1ee9 b\u1eadc c\u1ee9ng nh\u1eafc. Hi\u1ec3u ngu\u1ed3n g\u1ed1c gi\u00fap ng\u01b0\u1eddi lao \u0111\u1ed9ng ti\u1ebfp c\u1eadn v\u1ea5n \u0111\u1ec1 n\u00e0y m\u1ed9t c\u00e1ch t\u1eeb bi v\u1edbi b\u1ea3n th\u00e2n thay v\u00ec t\u1ef1 tr\u00e1ch. Quan tr\u1ecdng h\u01a1n, nh\u1eadn ra nguy\u00ean nh\u00e2n l\u00e0 b\u01b0\u1edbc \u0111\u1ea7u ti\u00ean kh\u00f4ng th\u1ec3 b\u1ecf qua tr\u01b0\u1edbc khi b\u1eaft \u0111\u1ea7u b\u1ea5t k\u1ef3 thay \u0111\u1ed5i h\u00e0nh vi n\u00e0o \u2014 v\u00ec n\u1ebfu kh\u00f4ng hi\u1ec3u t\u1ea1i sao m\u00ecnh ph\u1ea3n \u1ee9ng theo c\u00e1ch \u0111\u00f3, c\u00e1c k\u1ef9 thu\u1eadt thay \u0111\u1ed5i ng\u1eafn h\u1ea1n s\u1ebd kh\u00f3 duy tr\u00ec \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c l\u00e2u.<\/p>\n

\u2013 M\u00f4i tr\u01b0\u1eddng gia \u0111\u00ecnh c\u00f3 \u0111i\u1ec1u ki\u1ec7n c\u1ea3m x\u00fac (t\u00ecnh y\u00eau th\u01b0\u01a1ng \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c trao khi ph\u1ee5c t\u00f9ng, b\u1ecb r\u00fat l\u1ea1i khi kh\u00f4ng \u0111\u1ed3ng \u00fd) t\u1ea1o ra t\u00edn hi\u1ec7u th\u1ea7n kinh li\u00ean k\u1ebft “l\u00e0m h\u00e0i l\u00f2ng ng\u01b0\u1eddi kh\u00e1c” v\u1edbi “an to\u00e0n”.<\/p>\n

\u2013 C\u00e1c n\u1ec1n v\u0103n h\u00f3a \u0111\u1ec1 cao t\u1eadp th\u1ec3 h\u01a1n c\u00e1 nh\u00e2n (collectivist cultures), bao g\u1ed3m nhi\u1ec1u x\u00e3 h\u1ed9i ch\u00e2u \u00c1, c\u00f3 xu h\u01b0\u1edbng gia t\u0103ng \u00e1p l\u1ef1c x\u00e3 h\u1ed9i l\u00ean h\u00e0nh vi people pleasing theo Nghi\u00ean c\u1ee9u c\u1ee7a Hofstede Insights v\u1ec1 ch\u1ec9 s\u1ed1 v\u0103n h\u00f3a qu\u1ed1c gia.<\/p>\n

\u2013 Nh\u1eefng tr\u1ea3i nghi\u1ec7m b\u1ecb b\u1eaft n\u1ea1t ho\u1eb7c b\u1ecb c\u00f4 l\u1eadp t\u1ea1i tr\u01b0\u1eddng h\u1ecdc ho\u1eb7c n\u01a1i l\u00e0m vi\u1ec7c tr\u01b0\u1edbc \u0111\u00e2y c\u00f3 th\u1ec3 c\u1ee7ng c\u1ed1 ni\u1ec1m tin r\u1eb1ng \u0111\u1ed3ng \u00fd v\u00e0 ph\u1ee5c t\u00f9ng l\u00e0 chi\u1ebfn l\u01b0\u1ee3c an to\u00e0n nh\u1ea5t.<\/p>\n

\u2013 M\u00f4i tr\u01b0\u1eddng c\u00f4ng ty c\u00f3 v\u0103n h\u00f3a qu\u1ea3n l\u00fd b\u1eb1ng n\u1ed7i s\u1ee3, n\u01a1i ph\u00ea b\u00ecnh b\u1ecb tr\u1eebng ph\u1ea1t v\u00e0 \u0111\u1ed3ng thu\u1eadn \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c th\u01b0\u1edfng, v\u00f4 t\u00ecnh t\u00e1i l\u1eadp \u0111i\u1ec1u ki\u1ec7n people pleasing ngay c\u1ea3 \u1edf ng\u01b0\u1eddi tr\u01b0\u1edfng th\u00e0nh.<\/p>\n

\u0110i\u1ec3m chung c\u1ee7a t\u1ea5t c\u1ea3 c\u00e1c nguy\u00ean nh\u00e2n tr\u00ean l\u00e0: people pleasing v\u1ed1n b\u1eaft ngu\u1ed3n t\u1eeb nhu c\u1ea7u an to\u00e0n ho\u00e0n to\u00e0n h\u1ee3p l\u00fd, ch\u1ec9 l\u00e0 c\u01a1 ch\u1ebf th\u1ef1c hi\u1ec7n nhu c\u1ea7u \u0111\u00f3 kh\u00f4ng c\u00f2n ph\u00f9 h\u1ee3p v\u1edbi b\u1ed1i c\u1ea3nh ng\u01b0\u1eddi tr\u01b0\u1edfng th\u00e0nh trong m\u00f4i tr\u01b0\u1eddng l\u00e0m vi\u1ec7c chuy\u00ean nghi\u1ec7p.<\/p>\n

4. C\u00e1ch tho\u00e1t kh\u1ecfi v\u00f2ng l\u1eb7p People Pleasing trong m\u00f4i tr\u01b0\u1eddng l\u00e0m vi\u1ec7c<\/h2>\n

Thay \u0111\u1ed5i xu h\u01b0\u1edbng t\u00e2m l\u00fd \u0111\u00e3 \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c h\u00ecnh th\u00e0nh l\u00e2u n\u0103m kh\u00f4ng x\u1ea3y ra qua m\u1ed9t quy\u1ebft \u0111\u1ecbnh duy nh\u1ea5t. \u0110\u00e2y l\u00e0 qu\u00e1 tr\u00ecnh x\u00e2y d\u1ef1ng nh\u1eadn th\u1ee9c v\u00e0 luy\u1ec7n t\u1eadp h\u00e0nh vi m\u1edbi theo t\u1eebng b\u01b0\u1edbc, th\u01b0\u1eddng k\u1ebft h\u1ee3p v\u1edbi s\u1ef1 h\u1ed7 tr\u1ee3 t\u1eeb chuy\u00ean gia t\u00e2m l\u00fd ho\u1eb7c hu\u1ea5n luy\u1ec7n ngh\u1ec1 nghi\u1ec7p (executive coaching). \u0110i\u1ec1u quan tr\u1ecdng l\u00e0 b\u1eaft \u0111\u1ea7u t\u1eeb c\u00e1c t\u00ecnh hu\u1ed1ng nh\u1ecf, \u00edt r\u1ee7i ro tr\u01b0\u1edbc khi \u00e1p d\u1ee5ng \u1edf c\u00e1c quy\u1ebft \u0111\u1ecbnh quan tr\u1ecdng h\u01a1n.<\/p>\n

\u2013 Nh\u1eadn di\u1ec7n kho\u1ea3nh kh\u1eafc you say yes nh\u01b0ng mu\u1ed1n n\u00f3i no: ghi l\u1ea1i nh\u1eadt k\u00fd trong 1\u20132 tu\u1ea7n \u0111\u1ec3 th\u1ea5y r\u00f5 t\u1ea7n su\u1ea5t v\u00e0 b\u1ed1i c\u1ea3nh.<\/p>\n

\u2013 Luy\u1ec7n t\u1eadp c\u00e1c c\u00e2u t\u1eeb ch\u1ed1i l\u1ecbch s\u1ef1 nh\u01b0ng r\u00f5 r\u00e0ng: “T\u00f4i kh\u00f4ng th\u1ec3 nh\u1eadn th\u00eam vi\u1ec7c n\u00e0y v\u00e0o tu\u1ea7n n\u00e0y, nh\u01b0ng c\u00f3 th\u1ec3 gi\u00fap b\u1ea1n v\u00e0o tu\u1ea7n t\u1edbi” thay v\u00ec xin l\u1ed7i d\u00e0i d\u00f2ng.<\/p>\n

\u2013 Ph\u00e2n bi\u1ec7t gi\u1eefa “T\u00f4i mu\u1ed1n gi\u00fap” v\u00e0 “T\u00f4i s\u1ee3 h\u1eadu qu\u1ea3 n\u1ebfu kh\u00f4ng gi\u00fap” \u2014 c\u00e2u h\u1ecfi n\u00e0y gi\u00fap ki\u1ec3m tra \u0111\u1ed9ng l\u1ef1c th\u1ef1c s\u1ef1 tr\u01b0\u1edbc khi \u0111\u01b0a ra quy\u1ebft \u0111\u1ecbnh.<\/p>\n

\u2013 L\u00e0m vi\u1ec7c v\u1edbi chuy\u00ean gia t\u00e2m l\u00fd tr\u1ecb li\u1ec7u nh\u1eadn th\u1ee9c \u2014 h\u00e0nh vi (CBT) n\u1ebfu xu h\u01b0\u1edbng n\u00e0y \u1ea3nh h\u01b0\u1edfng nghi\u00eam tr\u1ecdng \u0111\u1ebfn ch\u1ea5t l\u01b0\u1ee3ng s\u1ed1ng v\u00e0 c\u00f4ng vi\u1ec7c.<\/p>\n

\u2013 X\u00e2y d\u1ef1ng th\u00f3i quen ki\u1ec3m tra \u0111\u1ed9ng l\u1ef1c tr\u01b0\u1edbc m\u1ed7i quy\u1ebft \u0111\u1ecbnh quan tr\u1ecdng: “T\u00f4i \u0111ang l\u00e0m \u0111i\u1ec1u n\u00e0y v\u00ec t\u00f4i mu\u1ed1n, hay v\u00ec t\u00f4i s\u1ee3 h\u1eadu qu\u1ea3 n\u1ebfu kh\u00f4ng l\u00e0m?” \u2014 c\u00e2u h\u1ecfi \u0111\u01a1n gi\u1ea3n n\u00e0y c\u00f3 th\u1ec3 thay \u0111\u1ed5i c\u00e1ch b\u1ea1n ra quy\u1ebft \u0111\u1ecbnh theo th\u1eddi gian.<\/p>\n

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L\u1eddi khuy\u00ean th\u1ef1c t\u1ebf \u0111\u1ec3 thay \u0111\u1ed5i d\u1ea7n d\u1ea7n<\/strong><\/p>\n

\u2013 B\u1eaft \u0111\u1ea7u v\u1edbi ranh gi\u1edbi nh\u1ecf: t\u1eeb ch\u1ed1i m\u1ed9t y\u00eau c\u1ea7u kh\u00f4ng c\u1ea5p b\u00e1ch m\u1ed7i tu\u1ea7n v\u00e0 quan s\u00e1t r\u1eb1ng th\u1ebf gi\u1edbi v\u1eabn ti\u1ebfp t\u1ee5c b\u00ecnh th\u01b0\u1eddng \u2014 \u0111i\u1ec1u n\u00e0y gi\u00fap n\u00e3o b\u1ed9 h\u1ecdc l\u1ea1i r\u1eb1ng t\u1eeb ch\u1ed1i kh\u00f4ng g\u00e2y ra h\u1eadu qu\u1ea3 nghi\u00eam tr\u1ecdng.<\/p>\n

\u2013 Tr\u01b0\u1edbc m\u1ed7i cu\u1ed9c h\u1ecdp quan tr\u1ecdng, h\u00e3y x\u00e1c \u0111\u1ecbnh tr\u01b0\u1edbc \u00edt nh\u1ea5t m\u1ed9t \u0111i\u1ec3m b\u1ea1n s\u1eb5n s\u00e0ng b\u00e0y t\u1ecf \u00fd ki\u1ebfn \u2014 ngay c\u1ea3 khi \u0111\u00f3 l\u00e0 c\u00e2u h\u1ecfi, kh\u00f4ng nh\u1ea5t thi\u1ebft l\u00e0 ph\u1ea3n \u0111\u1ed1i.<\/p>\n

\u2013 X\u00e2y d\u1ef1ng “ng\u01b0\u1eddi b\u1ea1n tr\u00e1ch nhi\u1ec7m” (accountability partner) \u2014 m\u1ed9t \u0111\u1ed3ng nghi\u1ec7p tin c\u1eady ho\u1eb7c mentor c\u00f3 th\u1ec3 quan s\u00e1t v\u00e0 ph\u1ea3n h\u1ed3i khi b\u1ea1n \u0111ang r\u01a1i v\u00e0o v\u00f2ng l\u1eb7p people pleasing m\u00e0 kh\u00f4ng nh\u1eadn ra.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n

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5. C\u00e2u h\u1ecfi th\u01b0\u1eddng g\u1eb7p<\/h2>\n

1. People pleaser c\u00f3 ph\u1ea3i l\u00e0 r\u1ed1i lo\u1ea1n t\u00e2m l\u00fd kh\u00f4ng?<\/em><\/strong> People pleasing t\u1ef1 n\u00f3 kh\u00f4ng \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c ph\u00e2n lo\u1ea1i l\u00e0 r\u1ed1i lo\u1ea1n t\u00e2m th\u1ea7n trong DSM-5. Tuy nhi\u00ean, n\u00f3 c\u00f3 th\u1ec3 l\u00e0 tri\u1ec7u ch\u1ee9ng c\u1ee7a r\u1ed1i lo\u1ea1n lo \u00e2u x\u00e3 h\u1ed9i, r\u1ed1i lo\u1ea1n nh\u00e2n c\u00e1ch ph\u1ee5 thu\u1ed9c ho\u1eb7c h\u1eadu qu\u1ea3 c\u1ee7a ch\u1ea5n th\u01b0\u01a1ng t\u00e2m l\u00fd (trauma). N\u1ebfu \u1ea3nh h\u01b0\u1edfng nghi\u00eam tr\u1ecdng \u0111\u1ebfn cu\u1ed9c s\u1ed1ng, n\u00ean tham v\u1ea5n chuy\u00ean gia t\u00e2m l\u00fd.<\/p>\n

2. Ng\u01b0\u1eddi qu\u1ea3n l\u00fd c\u00f3 n\u00ean tr\u00e1nh tuy\u1ec3n nh\u00e2n vi\u00ean c\u00f3 xu h\u01b0\u1edbng people pleaser kh\u00f4ng?<\/em><\/strong> Kh\u00f4ng n\u00ean lo\u1ea1i tr\u1eeb ho\u00e0n to\u00e0n. Trong nhi\u1ec1u vai tr\u00f2 nh\u01b0 d\u1ecbch v\u1ee5 kh\u00e1ch h\u00e0ng ho\u1eb7c h\u1ed7 tr\u1ee3 n\u1ed9i b\u1ed9, kh\u1ea3 n\u0103ng \u0111\u1ed3ng c\u1ea3m v\u00e0 linh ho\u1ea1t l\u00e0 t\u00e0i s\u1ea3n. V\u1ea5n \u0111\u1ec1 l\u00e0 m\u1ee9c \u0111\u1ed9 v\u00e0 kh\u1ea3 n\u0103ng thi\u1ebft l\u1eadp ranh gi\u1edbi \u2014 nh\u00e0 qu\u1ea3n l\u00fd c\u1ea7n t\u1ea1o m\u00f4i tr\u01b0\u1eddng an to\u00e0n \u0111\u1ec3 nh\u00e2n vi\u00ean c\u00f3 th\u1ec3 t\u1eeb ch\u1ed1i h\u1ee3p l\u00fd.<\/p>\n

3. L\u00e0m th\u1ebf n\u00e0o \u0111\u1ec3 ph\u00e2n bi\u1ec7t ng\u01b0\u1eddi people pleaser v\u1edbi ng\u01b0\u1eddi c\u00f3 k\u1ef9 n\u0103ng giao ti\u1ebfp t\u1ed1t?<\/em><\/strong> Ng\u01b0\u1eddi c\u00f3 k\u1ef9 n\u0103ng giao ti\u1ebfp t\u1ed1t c\u00f3 th\u1ec3 \u0111\u1ed3ng \u00fd ho\u1eb7c t\u1eeb ch\u1ed1i t\u00f9y t\u00ecnh hu\u1ed1ng m\u00e0 kh\u00f4ng c\u1ea3m th\u1ea5y lo l\u1eafng qu\u00e1 m\u1ee9c. Ng\u01b0\u1eddi people pleaser th\u01b0\u1eddng kh\u00f4ng c\u00f3 l\u1ef1a ch\u1ecdn t\u00e2m l\u00fd th\u1ef1c s\u1ef1 \u2014 h\u1ecd \u0111\u1ed3ng \u00fd v\u00ec lo s\u1ee3, kh\u00f4ng ph\u1ea3i v\u00ec ph\u00e1n x\u00e9t t\u00ecnh hu\u1ed1ng.<\/p>\n

Nh\u1eadn bi\u1ebft v\u00e0 thay \u0111\u1ed5i xu h\u01b0\u1edbng people pleaser<\/strong> l\u00e0 m\u1ed9t trong nh\u1eefng \u0111\u1ea7u t\u01b0 ngh\u1ec1 nghi\u1ec7p c\u00f3 gi\u00e1 tr\u1ecb nh\u1ea5t m\u00e0 ng\u01b0\u1eddi lao \u0111\u1ed9ng hi\u1ec7n \u0111\u1ea1i c\u00f3 th\u1ec3 th\u1ef1c hi\u1ec7n. Kh\u00f4ng ph\u1ea3i v\u00ec “n\u00f3i kh\u00f4ng” l\u00e0 t\u1ed1t h\u01a1n “n\u00f3i c\u00f3”, m\u00e0 v\u00ec kh\u1ea3 n\u0103ng \u0111\u01b0a ra l\u1ef1a ch\u1ecdn th\u1ef1c s\u1ef1 \u2014 kh\u00f4ng b\u1ecb chi ph\u1ed1i b\u1edfi lo \u00e2u v\u1ec1 s\u1ef1 ch\u1ea5p thu\u1eadn c\u1ee7a ng\u01b0\u1eddi kh\u00e1c \u2014 l\u00e0 n\u1ec1n t\u1ea3ng \u0111\u1ec3 x\u00e2y d\u1ef1ng s\u1ef1 nghi\u1ec7p b\u1ec1n v\u1eefng, ph\u00e1t tri\u1ec3n k\u1ef9 n\u0103ng l\u00e3nh \u0111\u1ea1o v\u00e0 duy tr\u00ec s\u1ee9c kh\u1ecfe tinh th\u1ea7n l\u00e2u d\u00e0i trong m\u00f4i tr\u01b0\u1eddng l\u00e0m vi\u1ec7c ng\u00e0y c\u00e0ng \u0111\u00f2i h\u1ecfi cao.<\/p>\n

Minh An<\/strong><\/p>\n

N\u1ed9i dung trong b\u00e0i mang t\u00ednh tham kh\u1ea3o v\u00e0 \u0111\u1ecbnh h\u01b0\u1edbng t\u1ed5ng quan; c\u01a1 h\u1ed9i ngh\u1ec1 nghi\u1ec7p v\u00e0 thu nh\u1eadp th\u1ef1c t\u1ebf c\u00f3 th\u1ec3 kh\u00e1c nhau t\u00f9y thu\u1ed9c v\u00e0o n\u0103ng l\u1ef1c, kinh nghi\u1ec7m, v\u1ecb tr\u00ed, doanh nghi\u1ec7p v\u00e0 th\u1eddi \u0111i\u1ec3m th\u1ecb tr\u01b0\u1eddng.<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

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